Movies are filled with the classic action-hero tough guy who always gets the girl. Forget about the mild-mannered, helpful sidekick; in the end it’s the muscled man with the most bandages (who’s killed the most bad guys) who goes to bed with the gorgeous girl. Is this stereotype isolated to Hollywood alone? Or does it reflect real life as well?
Understanding the Attraction
Unfortunately for Mr. Nice Guy, women do have a surprising tendency to gravitate towards the bad boy. The question is why? Bad boys are generally unpredictable, don’t treat their girlfriends the way they should, and usually leave a trail of broken hearts in their wake. So why the attraction?
For one thing, bad boys are interesting. A girl will never be bored when she’s involved with a troublemaker. Whether or not this is a good thing is not the issue – it’s just part of the draw. Another aspect of the attraction lies within the challenge. No woman can resist the allure of trying to “reform the rake.” She’s heard all about his reputation and how no girl will ever tame his heart. She thinks she can. If the rogue is ready to be tamed, she might have a chance. But if he’s not – forget it. The poor girl will be just another notch on his bedpost.
Understanding the Cycle
If a woman becomes involved with one bad boy, chances are she will date one again in the future. Even if she had her heart broken, stomped on, and ripped to shreds – she will still fall for the same type of guy. You rational men out there may be thinking she’s crazy but the reality is she may not be able to help it. A woman who’s been badly hurt (usually at a young age) may constantly try to make amends for the failed relationship. She’s not sure what went wrong, but she has a deep-seated desire to fix it. By falling for the same type of man who broke her heart, she may unconsciously be trying to succeed where she failed in the past.
As a woman, I have to admit there is something undeniably sexy about a bad boy. His charm, self-confidence, maverick personality and flirtatious nature make him hard to resist. Rebels are exciting and adventurous and appeal to a woman’s desire to walk on the wild side. Because of their popularity and many conquests, bad boys know how to please a woman – a definite plus.
Although there may be many pros for dating a bad boy, there are usually even more cons. Smart women would do well to stay far away and keep their hearts intact. If you are a nice guy, don’t spend your time worrying about whether your bad boy buddy will end up getting all the girls. Now that you realize why women fall for the bad boy, you can develop those qualities. Be adventurous, interesting, and exciting. Don’t be predictable or afraid to spice things up. Then you’ll be the kind of bad boy women really want – the kind who is a genuinely nice guy.
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Wednesday, 29 December 2010